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EnteringtheCastle.com

Tending to My Castle

9/9/2014

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It has been three years since I have written anything on these pages, but I will adding frequently as I move forward through my castle.   Some of what I will share will be specific to a certain topic I feel passionate about, and some posts will be more personal to my own journey and growth along the way.  

 Buckle your seatbelt ... this is gonna be a bumpy ride.
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Happy Feet

5/28/2012

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The movie "Happy Feet" is a great tool to highlight the unwarranted judgments, stressors and difficulties faced by those who are in some way different from the norm.  I’m not sure if it was intentional, but the story certainly echoes the journey of children who struggle in the classroom.  Just like the movie our educational system and cultural values can turn many happy and joyous children into fearful, anxiety-ridden souls who doubt their intelligence and place in the world. This is not done intentionally, but it happens because we have a narrowly defined  “acceptable” way of learning. Children who struggle with reading, spelling, math and organization are often told to try harder, labeled lazy, laughed at by their peers and given special classes that highlight their areas of weakness.  

The struggling students are never told their difficulty in some subjects is simply because they are right-brain learners; they are seldom given the appropriate tools to match their right-brain learning styles; and they are rarely praised and accepted for the gifts and intelligence they possess.  Instead, they are unintentionally made to feel rejected, confused and stupid because their learning needs don’t fit our left-brain educational system.  Is it any wonder that some struggling students begin to act out as their anxiety, anger, confusion and hopelessness increases with each school year.

What a difference it would make if ALL children were given the opportunity to understand how the two hemispheres of the brain operate differently. All children would understand their unique learning style and wouldn’t have to wonder why some subjects were more difficult to master. This doesn’t mean the skills from the non-dominant hemisphere can’t be learned, but it may require classes designed for right and left-brain learners.  These easy changes would increase student’s self-knowledge, and teach students about diversity, acceptance and an appreciation of our complex brain functions.

Read the summary of Happy Feet Below (or watch the movie!) and ask yourself these questions: Why do many of our children enter school happy and inquisitive, and suddenly begin feeling isolated, anxious, depressed, angry and abandoned?  Are they lazy? Do they not care about their future?  Or might our educational system and society need to learn about right brain learners and begin to appreciate these highly intelligent, creative people?

As a community we have a choice to make a giant leap … a paradigm shift in our education system and the opportunity to change the future of many students.  Too many of our bright happy kids are giving up on their futures, turning to drugs/alcohol, or ending up with legal issues because we are not hearing their heartsongs.  Let’s open our hearts and see the gifts we have been overlooking for far too long.


Happy Feet
The movie, Happy Feet, is a wonderful tale about a young penguin named Mumbo. Mumbo was born with feet that liked to tap out the rhythm of his heart. He had a great attitude and sense of humor, plus a huge capacity to love.  One would think this loveable little guy would have been the joy of his community.  The only problem was his culture said Heart Songs were to be sung and he couldn’t sing. 

Mumbo was unaware of his difference when he was young. He laughed, played and felt good about himself.  But when he entered school it became very obvious he couldn’t do what was expected.; he couldn’t sing.  He was laughed at and he was given special teachers. Mumbo began to understand the societal rule: being different was unacceptable. Instead of being embraced for his gifts Mumbo was alienated  by many judgmental questions:
What’s wrong with him?
Why isn’t he like everyone else?
Did something happen during birth?
Why doesn’t he just try harder?

Many well-intentioned teachers tried to help him learn how to SING his heartsong. They would have him visualize the sound and visualize his parents pride in hearing his song, but the song always came out of his tapping feet. The lessons made Mumbo feel worse and he was also given the idea he failed his parents. Eventually his teachers, parents and friends gave up hoping Mumbo would ever be able to SING a  heartsong that would connect him to his community. And Due to  social conditioning , the community was not able to HEAR Mumbo’s heartsong streaming out of his Happy Feet.  How sad.

Heart broken and feeling alone, Mumbo often escaped to places where he could tap out his song. He was often found daydreaming as he imagined a world where he would not only be accepted, but where he could feel like he belonged.  One of Mumbo's gifts was his acceptance of others who were different from him, probably because he knew what it was like to be unfairly judged.  Sometimes, his acceptance would get  him in trouble, but  Mumbo eventually found friends that accepted him. His new friends shocked Mumbo because they could hear his heartsong and affirmed his gifts.  Mumbo finally felt  loved and accepted,  but he still longed to be accepted by his own community.
In the end,  Mumbo's community  did open their hearts and expanded their minds to hear Mumbo's happy feet heart-song,. But more importantly they began to understand how much they could learn from each other and how well they complemented each other. It was a happy ending for everyone. 





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Life on Pause

10/4/2011

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In a world that's filled with instant communication, freaky fast deliveries and a "You can do it!" mentality it's hard when life suddenly pauses. 

What is a pause? I guess I'd say they are the times when life stops flowing in a manner that grabs our attention and makes us wonder why nothing is moving. Examples include: times we're looking for work and nothing is available; or we want a relationship, but we're not meeting anyone; or maybe it's simply a time that seems eerily quiet.  Pauses, I think, can happen for many reasons.

The "brick wall" pause occurs because it's simply not the right situation for us. Those times when we find ourself banging our head on a brick wall wanting/waiting for something to happen. And only when we are exhausted from the effort do we stop, breathe and look around for a new possibility. Once we pull back and look around we tend to find a new (and typically much easier) path to take. And often we look back and wonder why we wasted so much time banging our heads on a brick wall.  

The patience pause - sometimes pauses occur because we are waiting for other pieces to fall into place.
Through no fault of our own we are left to simply wait. UGH! How frustrating this can be especially when we are ready to go ... we just want to go! But as much as we may be ready the universe asks us to have patience, relax, and trust that it will all come together when the time is right. 

The observation pause is the universe's way of bringing our attention to our life.
When we are in the flow of life, we seldom have time to take stock of all the little nuances taking place. We fly through our days ticking off all of the items on our "to-do" lists, typically our heads are three steps ahead of what we are doing and our job is to keep up with our racing mind.  It is incredibly hard to stop the flow of our day and seldom do we have time to stop and take notice of the small seemingly unnoticeable events. But when we are "paused"  we can stop and observe the little things happening. 

And then there is the "get ready" pause! When we know something big is about to happen and the universe is giving us a moment of grace.  It is a pause that allows us to take a giant breath before launching into a new arena. Its as if an invitation is made to take advantage of those quiet moments with a subtle warning ... you'll need the strength! 

Pause are a part of life. How we interpret the pause, seems to make a large difference in our mental health. Do we see pauses as boring, seemingly wasteful times in our life that cause us great stress or might we see it as a fertile void giving us a moment of grace?  If you feel paused, take a moment to reflect on what kind of pause you are feeling and allow that to lead you into grace. 
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Personal Responsibility

9/19/2011

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This week I want to talk about personal responsibility or more to the point ... Owning Our Crap! It seems no matter what hat I am wearing (mother, daughter, sister, friend, partner, therapist...) I hear blame being cast on others which gets people stuck in a victim pattern.  Playing the victim only encourages grudge holding and keeps us from growing in self-understanding.

VICTIM is one of those great archetypes* that can really bring our self-development to a screeching halt, and yet we are socially conditioned to blame others. The classic example: who is to blame if I get fat from eating at McDonald's?  The logical answer would be MYSELF!! But because of the "Victim" archetype running in the collective unconscious there are successful lawsuits blaming McDonald's!!! CRAZY!!

Now let's make it a little bit harder, let's say a "ANA" had a lot of money and bought dinner for her friends and no one thanked her  ... Did they take advantage of Ana?  
And what if it became a pattern for the group to go out every week with the unstated expectation that Ana would buy. Wearing a smile, Ana does buy each week, BUT feels taken advantage of and begins to resent her friends.  Is she being taken advantage of? Is she a victim?   
I'd say, No.   BUT I would be curious why Ana bought dinner for her friends in the first place, why she felt she had to pay, and why she was angry they didn't thank her.  And from there I'd help her discern how she was "playing" the victim.

I'm not saying people don't do creepy things or act rudely, we all have our moments. BUT how we react to what happens or the "story we tell ourself" has a HUGE affect on our life.  If we act like we had no choice - if we act like a VICTIM - we will continually fall into the victim role. That means we won't own our own stuff or grow to our full potential.  Blaming others is easy, but it won't help us grow. 

Let's look back to the story of Ana ... 
Ana blamed her friends for taking advantage of her ... that's the easy way out. 
Much harder would be for Ana to determine WHY she paid for the dinner. Was she "buying" her friends? Was she afraid they wouldn't spend time with her if she didn't buy dinner?  Why did she continue to partake in a behavior that was causing her pain and resentment?   THESE are the hard questions. THESE are the types of questions that create a deeper sense of self-knowledge.   

All of us have areas where we play into the victim archetype. The first step is to acknowledge it exists; the second step is to admit we play the victim role; and then we need develop self-knowledge to own our crap and take personal responsibility for how we "play" the victim.  By doing this we grow in our self-knowledge and understanding, we break old patterns, gain confidence and become our most empowered self. YAY! It's a harder route to take, but well worth it in the end. 




*The dictionary definition for archetype is "A concept in Jungian psychology - an inherited pattern of thought or symbolic imagery derived from the past collective experience and present in the individual unconscious."  
In my terms, an archetype is a pattern or thought that most of the population buys into and it's been around so long no one thinks to question the pattern.   

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No More Hiding in the Closet

9/12/2011

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St. Paul is credited with one of my favorite bible quotes, " What you expose to the light, becomes light." 

The first time I read that line I was struck by the depth of its simple truth. And even today it reminds me to stop hiding things in the proverbial closet; because once things are stored in the closet  ... they go on steroids! I'm not kidding! Have you ever noticed how annoying little "nothings" get pumped up into large, heavy, uncontrollable MONSTERS once they spend time in the closet? It's so true! And if you stop and think about it ... we spend an awful lot of time and energy trying to keep the closet door shut. Even the thought of what might tumble out the cracks in the door is enough to have us calling our therapist, best bud ... or bartender!

One of the tricks I learned from my education is to RUN to the closet door and yank it open. Yep, my classmates  and I let all those big, scary monsters out of the closet and dealt with each one of them in the light. And a funny thing happened,  once we opened our closet doors and started sorting through the "monsters" in clear light ... we found they were only annoying, little nothings. We laughed as we realized how much energy we spent holding back old memories, hurts and past mistakes we had learned from ... nothing was very scary at all. As St. Paul said, "Expose it to the light, and it becomes light!"

You may notice that your own closet door is beginning to rattle. It's as if someone has turned on a light and is shouting "No More Hiding in the Closet!"  Different people have different ways of explaining the phenomena, but I think it is due to a shift in how much light our planet is being infused with as we enter the photon-band.  

THE WHAT???
The photo-band is concept used by folks who watch the stars. It basically states the planets and solar systems are currently lined up in a way that gives us more light to the earth.  I'm not interested in proving or disproving the concept ... only in understanding how it may affect us. From what I read, this extra light is working very much like an x-ray; casting more light on our "shadows" making them easy to see and define. 

I know it makes sense for my life and the stuff that's coming up. And my friends and clients are reporting how their "stuff" is coming up, as well.  The good news is ... not only is it coming up, but it is coming up in a way that is more easy to define and, therefore, easier to process! Yay!  Some of the fastest processing I've ever seen is happening right now.  It's as if the universe is helping our healing :) If you're a Christian, it seems the light of the world is shining brightly -  illuminating all of the darkness and saying, "No more hiding in the closet! If you won't bring it to the Light ... the Light will come to you.  Heal! Rise up! Ephphatha ... Be opened!"

May you follow the wisdom of St. Paul this week: Open your closet doors ... expose everything to the light and let it become light.   Ephphatha ... Be opened!








   
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Being Barefoot - Grounding the Soul

8/21/2011

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Lately, I find myself wanting to be barefoot.  Not that this is unusual for me, I've always preferred being barefoot, but noticing the NEED to be barefoot is new to me. I've been finding myself hating the feel of shoes. I honestly loathe having them on ... it feels foreign and constricting.  And I notice the strong desire to plant my feet deep into the earth.  Today I even played tennis  - barefooted!  And I certainly have been getting my fair share of pedicures. What 's up with that??? 

On the contrary, I recently met a man who NEVER goes barefoot. I mean NEVER!!!  He always wears slippers in the house, shoes outside and water-shoes in the lake.  When I asked him to try and walk ten feet barefoot - he cringed!!!  And I thought, "What's up with that???" 

Why do some people LOVE being barefoot while others can't touch the ground?  AHA!  Being barefoot is very GROUNDING. When I thought back to this man's life I realized he was in the middle of a major transition ... he was "up in the air."   No wonder he can't touch the ground!  And yet, touching the earth (GROUNDING himself) may be exactly what he needs to settle down. 

Being barefoot places us in touch with the dirt of the earth, with Gaia's life-force.  It brings us to that place where our roots can settle down and build strength.  I sense, therefore, that my need to be barefoot is directly related to my need to be grounded.  And it comes at a perfect time! With the New Earth vibration manifesting in so many ways, it is important to anchor our energy to Gaia, Mother Earth.  It seems the more we feel the vibrational change ... the more we need our feet planted.  The more the vibration goes up ... the more we need the earth to settle down. Otherwise, we will be "up in the air" being tossed about on the winds of change. 

Have you ever walked through mulch that is decomposing and felt the heat and moisture on your feet? It's fabulous! It's so incredibly grounding.  If you are feeling unsettled, find a bit of earth and let your feet sink in - the "earthier" - the better.  Imagine you are planting the seed to become a mighty oak.  Allow yourself to settle down and feel your roots taking hold and being nourished. Just relax and enjoy the steady warmth.  

Thank you, Gaia, for providing us the grounding energy ... the very platform we need to settle into this new vibration.   
 
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Stop! Sucking it up!

8/14/2011

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This year ranks as one of the craziest "download" years on record!  For those of you just "tuning in" you may be surprised or possibly amused by the idea that we can receive "downloads" from on high. Some people call them inspiring dreams and others describe it as divine revelation. Whatever its called the person receives new information and is typically inspired to share it with others.    Believe it or not! :)

Truth be told, I receive downloads at 3:00 AM.  It doesn't happen every night, but every once and again I will be woken with an invitation for a download. Yes, an INVITATION for a download ... and I have always accepted. Often times this means I will spend much time researching strings and strands of seemingly unrelated material, until it coalesces into a brilliant conclusion that  I could not have thought of, nor expected.   

Anyway, this years' downloads have all centered around vibrations.  Specifically that of Nikola Tesla's work.  I spent much time learning about Wardenclyffe Tower and reactions caused when an environment changes its vibrational pattern.   Crazy! Over my head! Out there! And absolutely fascinating!!!!! :) 

(if you've never watched "What the Bleep do we Know" ... you're missing a great treat.) 

The download was intense and complicated, but I came away with a few simple ideas to carry forward and share with others.   First, we are made up of photons. Yes! We are actually beings of light and water!!!!  Secondly, thoughts carry vibration. And the vibration of a thought in the body can and will change how the body vibrates.  What does this mean .... basically, when we "suck it up" and hold negative vibrating thoughts in our body they get caught in a fishnet.  And like a fish caught in a net, those thoughts lash around in a state of dis-ease, eventually getting everything else vibrating in dis-ease ... causing disease! 

In a nutshell, we are making ourselves sick! We are causing our own depression, anxiety, cancer, arthritis, etc ... by holding onto grudges, regrets, fears, anger, bitterness, sadness and all other negative emotions.  Let's Stop! sucking it up.  Stop! Holding it in. Instead let's forgive, forget, let-go and find peace.
Be at peace and allow the body to be at rest.

We all have inner fishnets ... let's practice catch and release with out negative emotions. :)

 






  
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Negative Self-Talk

8/11/2011

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Over the last few weeks my site has gotten hundreds of  hits. WOW! I wasn't expecting that.  I assumed my dear friends would be checking it out, as a supportive act of friendship, but never did I expect that kind of traffic.  Immediately my heart began to race and self-critical statements began to surface.  If you jumped inside my head you would have heard a plethora of negative thoughts scrolling a mile a minute. Statements such as: 
The site isn't completed.  
There are spelling and grammar errors. 
What will they think? 
I shouldn't have done this!
They'll think I'm a moron! 
Blah, blah, blah  ...

Had I continued this line of thinking anxiety would have crept in, my self-esteem would have tanked, and I would have created a depressive episode. BLECH! Instead, I began laughing and writing. I've chosen to share this story with you, because I bet you have been in a similar situation. So let's normalize this experience and decrease the negative self-talk and everything that goes with it. 

What made me switch tracks from being negative to laughing?  Honestly, my education and self-knowledge pushed through.  I recognized I was placing myself in competition with the polished sites people are accustomed to seeing.  And then it hit me ... that's NOT me!  I am a work in progress. EVERYONE is a work in progress and my website is a reflection of that truth.  It will never be perfect, but it will have meaning and there will be growth.   

Once I was able to stop, breathe and think about what I was reacting to ... I was able to untangle myself from the negative self-talk and laugh at myself. That's why self-knowledge is so important. St. Teresa stated, "An hour spent developing self-knowledge is better than a day in prayer."  She was a very wise woman. 

I sense most of our problems in life stem from the attachment to an unattainable perfection.  I can't quote the current statistic, but I know (in general) we spend a lot of time and money trying to be perfect or at least LOOK it.  Unfortunately, most of the money and time is wasted on surface stuff: plastic surgery, diet products, pills of every kind ... do I need to go on?  I wonder what would change if we spent our resources on developing the deep stuff (self-knowledge) needed to laugh at ourselves instead?


On Monday I will be posting a follow-up to this Blog entitled "Stop Sucking it Up!"  My intention is to help explain why "sucking it up" is really BAD for our bodies.  Until then, remember no one is perfect - We are all just works in progress. :)















 

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Pedicure Blessings

8/7/2011

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There is a scripture passage that came SCREAMING down from on high this morning.  It was the passage where Jesus was having his feet washed with perfumed oil (the really expense stuff!) by a woman with long hair. Scripture tells us the apostles were furious this woman would WASTE the perfumed oil on Jesus' feet when the oil could have been sold and money given to feed the hungry.  

It is a great passage that I've heard many times throughout the years, but today it came with a twist.  Having worked in "church life" for fifteen years the passage was typically focused one of two ways. Sometimes it was used to explain why, in a world so rich in resources, we still had poverty.  And other times, it seemed more of a motivator for Stewardship, especially tithing money to the church - If the woman was spilling her treasure out on Jesus ... shouldn't you?  But THIS time it was a totally different story! THIS time I was encouraged to tell a friend to BE Jesus!!!  WOW! 

Be Jesus in this story for just one minute. 
Place yourself in a really cushy seat.  Imagine a very attractive person is positioning themselves at your feet and massaging your tootsies with perfumed oil. Mmmmmmm ... let the smell greet your senses, feel your body begin to relax, let all of the cares of life pass you by.  YUM! And when the world starts chiming in to say, "There is work to be done!" simply respond, "There will always be work to be done." while you continue to enjoy the pedicure. 

What a great way to begin to practice self-love.  So often in our lives we take such great care of others, but we forget to take care of ourselves.  We easily give up plans to help out a friend; we give away our vacation money to help a child through a tough spot; we give up personal time to help finish a work project .... we give ... we give ... we give.   We have been taught to be givers, but you can't keep giving if you are not receiving! You simply can't ... you'd be throughly depleted. 

Take a moment and consider.
How often do you stop and assess your own needs? How often do you sit and let yourself be pampered?  What is stopping you from doing so?  Jesus led by example. He allowed himself time to think, time away, time to have his tootsies rubbed!  He said, love others as you love yourself.  How are you practicing self-love?   This week I hope you enjoy pedicure blessings!

 
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Embracing the Wisdom of a Child

7/31/2011

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Ten years ago, I attended a party and had the pleasure of hearing a child sing.  I warmly recall watching my friends five–year-old daughter bounce into the center of the room excited to entertain us.  She sparkled with absolute confidence as she sang Mary Had a Little Lamb, and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.  This little gal hit many of the right keys and many clunkers, but we saw her as pure joy with the voice of an angel. She beamed with radiant glory as she shared her newly found gift and love of singing.  We gave a thunderous round of applause and she bowed with delight.  

This week, I was back at my friend’s house and the group was hoping to hear this same ‘not so little’ girl sing for us.  We’ve known from the start she is highly gifted and we were hoping to hear her piece that received a first-star at the state level competition. But despite our gentle coaxing, the young woman shook her head and claimed she wasn’t prepared.  WHAT?? She has had five years of voice training, sung the lead in the school musicals, competed against kids older than her and won! How was she NOT prepared to sing for us?   What happened to the joyful, confident five-year-old?

Life happened.  Somewhere along the way the pure, radiant joy she experienced sharing her natural gift, became conditional.  It began when she heard some of her pitches were flat and needed perfecting and worsened when she started to compare herself to others. And now the girl with the ‘voice of an angel’ will only sing if she has practiced the music, perfected it to a certain standard and has warmed up her vocal chords. The joy of listening to that youngster share her natural gift so freely has been lost.  What a shame.

What saddened me the most was the recognition of the joy we all lose along the way.  This young lady’s story is OUR story.  Each one of us has a unique gift we wanted to share with the world when we were young. But somewhere along the way it became conditional or it was discarded because someone didn’t value it.  How sad. 

But what if we went back?  What if we stopped listening to those conditional statements and embraced our gifts with the innocence of a five-year-old?  What if we stopped worrying about perfection and shared our gifts freely, with joy and confidence.  What if we gave each other thunderous applause for doing so? 

I think we would create a better world. Don’t you? J

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